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December, 1998 |
| After a loss of a pet the grieving process can be long and difficult for some, while simpler for others. The following from our resident trainer, Patti Samiec, is a reassurance that grieving is only natural. Grief is different for each individual and is, therefore, handled in a variety of ways. The loss of a pet can he very devastating. It can leave you feeling lonely. There is an emptiness that cannot be filled. animals love you unconditionally and that kind of love is irreplaceable. You may feel that you can only fill this emptiness in your life by getting another pet right away. This does not make you a bad person or does not mean that you did not love your pet. Another pet can fill the void and give you something to put your energy into. Remember, there is no other animal that can replace your deceased pet and you cannot compare one to another. You will not find your deceased pet in another. Too many people come to us looking for the same markings, same face, same size, etc. Every animal was created differently and each has its own personality and qualities. There are no two the same.
The grieving process is most difficult for any children in the family. It is hard for them to understand why their animal died. It is especially harder when the animal must be euthanized. Long ago we were told that when dealing with children never use the term "put to sleep", instead say the animal was "put down". In a child's mind they think the same could happen to them when they go to bed at night. |
Give children some intellectual credit. They know that something has happened when they see their pet is sick, you take it to the vet and then it does not come back. If the child is old enough, explain to them what is going on and why. In your own grief, do not forget that they are grieving too. If you had more than one pet in your home, the surviving pet may also be grieving. They may not want to eat and just lay around looking depressed. This is all normal ~ animals do grieve. Bring home a towel or blanket that the other animal was in so he can smell it and lay with it. This will help them go through the process. If you do decide to get another pet, remember yours may need time to adjust. It may take time for them to become friends. There are many good books that help explain what has happened.
Check your local library for the following titles:
William J Kay, Ed. "Pet Loss: A Thoughtful Guide for Adults and Children" Herb Niebeig and Arlene Fischer "Oh, Where Has My Pet Gone?" Sally Sibbet "The Tenth Good Thing About Barny" (for children) Judith Viorst |
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